In exchange for a new chapter of life~
2006 finally ends and let's welcome a brand new year. We are moving into 2007 and there are more events to come. 2006 marked a new chapter in my life. Last year, i gain something and lost something in return. I lost my freedom in exchange for a brand new life. I have skipped a lot of things in my life and this is the path that i took... Having my freedom go, i welcome my new family. Regrets? No... but really wished i can hold on to my freedom for a while longer.
It's not that i want to get my freedom back. I love my new family and welcoming my new baby is something which a mom can really gain happiness from and yet, not from other people but only from yourself. Somehow, it seems that this family is not just another ordinary family. It is something more than a simple family. It is also something that i wished for a long time that i could cancel...
In my life, i hate a few things to happen to me and some of them do happened on me. I hate being controlled by someone, having to live with someone that with do anything to benefit everyone esp, himself/herself. having to decide the things for me as that thing will at least benefit him in some ways... There are a lot of things that makes me rethink of giving my freedom away...
All i wish for is a simple family with no other people coming into our life. Right now, i only want the 3 of us to be a family and not include others. I don't wish my mom to know the existence of others. Of course, i admit i dun like them and in fact, i hate them... He knows but he want to let my mom know... and i hate that if he ever tell my mom about it... If they never pass my acceptance, i will not let my mom know about their existence. I accept him for having them and that is a fact. But he have to know, i want the only 3 of us to be our new family...
Until he can show me he is capable of handling this matter, then i will not rethink of letting my freedom wasted away for nothing... I am being selfish and yes i know that! He have to understand me as i have told him '000 of times that i am very selfish when it comes to this matter.
It's not that i want to get my freedom back. I love my new family and welcoming my new baby is something which a mom can really gain happiness from and yet, not from other people but only from yourself. Somehow, it seems that this family is not just another ordinary family. It is something more than a simple family. It is also something that i wished for a long time that i could cancel...
In my life, i hate a few things to happen to me and some of them do happened on me. I hate being controlled by someone, having to live with someone that with do anything to benefit everyone esp, himself/herself. having to decide the things for me as that thing will at least benefit him in some ways... There are a lot of things that makes me rethink of giving my freedom away...
All i wish for is a simple family with no other people coming into our life. Right now, i only want the 3 of us to be a family and not include others. I don't wish my mom to know the existence of others. Of course, i admit i dun like them and in fact, i hate them... He knows but he want to let my mom know... and i hate that if he ever tell my mom about it... If they never pass my acceptance, i will not let my mom know about their existence. I accept him for having them and that is a fact. But he have to know, i want the only 3 of us to be our new family...
Until he can show me he is capable of handling this matter, then i will not rethink of letting my freedom wasted away for nothing... I am being selfish and yes i know that! He have to understand me as i have told him '000 of times that i am very selfish when it comes to this matter.
Labels: Love
posted by nini-nounours at 2/05/2007 02:19:00 pm
1 Comments:
Interesting to know.
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